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[February 6th, 9:02pm]
i nevr ever write in here anymore buttttt methinks its time for a big rant
so this morning was pretty neat but then from noon on it was fucken faggy.
i'm so tired of friends that aren't "true" friends... like i'm tired of not being included in things for one. thats rude when your "friend" is standing there and you all decide to go to checkers after school but can't invite one person. 
and i hate when people blow things out of proportion. like how jenna did a bunch of whacked up shit at one of shawnas parties so now shawna doesnt like jenna and shawna posted a comment on my myspace about jenna and jenna got mad at me because i didnt stick up for her... but when i do stick up for people, they get mad at me for getting involved. i dont want to be up in everyones shit because they get mad but when i'm not  they get mad too.... 
and this is the worst and im about to call some people out on this one but oh the fuck well.
okay scott and andrew are dating. thats cool. im happy scott has finally found someone who makes him happy... what makes me mad though is now that he's with andrew i never see him. he calls out to work almost every night and everytime i want to hang out with him he wont go if andrew doesnt want to go. ive know him for 10 years of my life and this is stupid. he's like my big brother and he's changing and becoming irresponsible. i miss him to death. i miss going to dennys and going to the movies or chillen at the mall or going to sacred grounds at midnight and i miss sleeping in his bed and i miss singing rent at the top of our lungs in his car and i miss it all. i really want him back but he's changing and there isnt anything i can do. he is always at andrews and thats his life now. andrew andrew andrew. and it isnt andrews fault... from what i hear, andrew goes to work and has time for his friends. but not scott. and i hate it when i do see him and he says "oh i've missed you!!" but if he really missed me, wouldn't he make an attempt to hang out? and i've been trying to get a hold of kelly for over a month now because she too is like family to me. but she ignores calls and text messages... and brittany even told katie to tell her to call and we haven't heard from her but today i found out she hangs out with scott and andrew over at andrews place. i mean what the fuck? am i really that shitty of a friend that people can just forget about me like that easily? i miss it when kelly used to show up hours late and take us to cicis pizza and i miss midnight walmart runs and i miss katie. maybe they just dont realize what theyre doing. i miss kelly and scott with everything and it pisses me off they can just cut me off like that. those are supposed to be my closest friends and they cant find the time to say hi anymore.
honestly i would probably give anything to be with them like we up until around christmas. i hate how they cant give me or brittany the time of day anymore. its nuts.
Lonliness is the worst feeling I think I've ever felt and i'm feeling it right now more than I have in  a while.
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[December 27th, 11:12am]
Lauryn Hill is basically fucking amazing. I love her.
When I listen to her I remember all those stupid times io spent over at Shawnas house when I was 13. Yeahhhhbuddy
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[December 21st, 11:12am]
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[December 9th, 7:12am]

this is SOOOOO what im getting doug for christmas hahahaha
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[December 6th, 11:12pm]
I fucking hate school
they just fucked up my senior year along with the rest of my class
next year is going to suck so bad because we wont be on block schedule meaning less classes which means im going to have to fucking take night school
and we arent getting senior privelages next year because the last two senior classes fucked it up for us
and im pissed off because after getting let down and lied to, i trusted someone to do something simple and i guess they just forgot. oh fucking well.
and i hate how al is making an attempt to be nice. i fucking hate that cocksuck.
i hate days like this.
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[December 5th, 10:12pm]
pictures from today=]Collapse )
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[November 30th, 10:11pm]
i hate abundio diaz
he is a cock sucking dickfuck.
i hope he gets fucking fired or something
im sick of being treated like im shit
i cant do shit when he's the manager without fucking getting yelled at
i dont fucking get it
and im getting sick of him tendering everyone at the cash register but me
he's such a moldy twat
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[November 22nd, 11:11pm]
so jon and i started glamR shotz by Tif
Heres a sample of our work. ever wanted to look like this? cuz now you can with glamR shotz by tifCollapse )
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[November 20th, 3:11pm]
so how about the nightmare before christmas 3D soundtrack is the best ever. fuck yeaaa
next monday im going to dennys with scott and shawna yayyyya
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[November 20th, 6:11am]
its cold outside.
fucking pissed at VJ too
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[November 19th, 8:11pm]
today me and gladys and brittany and jonathon made angels that resembled our four great managers =]
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[November 17th, 10:11pm]
Today in band me, george, and jon went in the uniform room with a guitar and pretended we were johhny cash and june carter.
pretty swank.
george started playing get rhythm...
only instead it was called muffin...
and we improvised all sorts of words about skittles and pickes and paper and vagina juice...
and the song lasted for like an hour haha.
lots of fun man.
the three of us gotta do that again cuz it was cute.
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[November 16th, 9:11pm]
steak n shake thanksgiving FIESTAAAA on wednesday yaya
family thanksgiving on thursday... we're going to try that get together thing again like when my grampa died.
and uhm... i fucken love elvis. really much.
man speaking of elvis, i feel so fucking bad for my aunt. my aunt pat, who is like 60 something and looks like how my grandma did... i mean, spitting image... well she's obsessed with elvis... and we're going to her house for thanksgiving... but her husband is in the hospital... his lung collapsed.
and that really sucks. because i love uncle steve. he played a big role through out my younger years like when i was 5 6 7.
he's going to die pretty soon... and i really feel bad for aunt pat.

man i just found two really neat pictures. these are hilarious. they were taken a couple months ago but that was a mighty fun day.

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[November 16th, 6:11pm]
my cousin is such a fucking retarded douche i swear. so today im on my myspace and i got a message from him that was like "whyd you delete me off your friends were you just trying to copy scott because scott doesnt want you and he doesnt want me but your family whats your problem"
something gay like that... no punctuation either...
i cant message him back either... cuz hes not on my friends and he's 14...
i dunno
i didnt delete him. it was probably his mom because she's paranoid. duh penis licker.
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[November 15th, 6:11pm]
Something has changed within me. Something is not the same. I'm through with playing by the rules of someone else's game. Too late for second guessing... Too late to go back to sleep.
It's time to trust my instinct... close my eyes... and leap
It's time to try defying gravity. I think I'll try defying gravity and you can't pull me down.
I'm through accepting limits cuz someone says they're so.
Some things I cannot change, but til I try I'll never know.
Too long I've been afraid of losing love I guess I've lost
Well, If that's love, it comes at much too high a cost. I'd sooner buy defying gravity. Kiss me goodbye. I'm defying gravity and you can't bring me down.

I'm limited... together we're unlimited.
Together we'll be the greatest team there's ever been...
Dreams they way we planned them if we work in tandem...
They'res no fight we cannot win... Just you and I defying gravity, you and I defying gravity... They'll never bring us down...

So If you care to find me, look to the Western sky... As someone told me lately, "Everyone deserves the chance to fly!" and, if I'm flying solo, at least I'm flying free... To those who ground me, take a message back from me... Tell them how I am defying gravity, Flying high defying gravity, and soon I'll match them in renound...

And... nobody in all of Oz, no Wizard that there is or was, is ever going to bring me down.
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[November 14th, 11:11am]
This is cute. All morning Cassie and I have been singing Christmas songs. She's excited. The number one toy on her list is Ariels Talking Salon...
and she told me that.
haha she's a cute patootie
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[November 14th, 7:11am]
man i just called my sister.
and by the way it's like 55 outiside.
and she and i always used to sing baby its cold outside...
so i was like "Hey brit... gotta warn you about the weather... here's my warning...
ba dum bump bump bump bump
I really can't stayyyy
I have to go away....
blah blah blah BABY ITS COLD OUTSIDE!!"

and she got mad at me. haha
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[November 13th, 8:11pm]


man you don't even much understand. Laura is totally our adopted sister only we did it illegally....
fucking pot head
i love laura!!!!!

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[November 13th, 6:11am]
When somebody can fall for you hard
and then finds out things about you that you didnt want them to know
and then attempts to just leave you there
and they can't....
because... I don't know... they just can't...
And they're still falling for you day by day...
Thats amazing.
amazing is my favorite word too.
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[November 12th, 9:11pm]

this picture is 84% true.
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